When YuGiOh Characters Go Mad
by Sami Ryou's Hikari
Summary: Run away! The YuGiOh characters have gone mad! Fifth chapter: Ishizu gets a new pet!
1. Default Chapter

Hey! I decided to create a humor fic, please don't kill me because I suck at humor! Anyway, this is a multi-chapter fic, first chapter features Seto Kaiba and Yami Yugi. Read on, my mind slaves!

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own YuGiOh, if I did, I would be a very wealthy Japanese Manga artist with all the YuGiOh merchandise you could ever want.

* * *

Seto Kaiba was duelling Yami again.  
Seto Kaiba was losing against Yami, again. And, once again, Yami was giving a speech about the Heart of the Cards.  
"Kaiba, you will never be able to defeat me if you don't trust in your cards power, and let the Heart of the Cards guide you…" and so on and so on.

Kaiba was getting fed up, after all, Yami was beating him by 1300 life points, Yami had his Dark Magician on the field, and to top it all off, he was getting yet another lecture on the non-existent Heart of the Cards! He was about to crack.  
"…and Kaiba, your cards will never live up to their true power if you don't believe in the Heart of the..."

"AAAAARRRGGGGGHHHH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" Seto had had enough. "I've had enough of your stupid Heart of the Cards! Heart of the Cards this, Heart of the Cards that…"

And with that, Kaiba took out a pair of scissors and strode over to Yami, all the way to the end of the Duelling zone. "What are you going to do, Kaiba?' Yami asked, alarmed by the sudden outburst of the wealthy CEO.  
Kaiba snatched Yami's Dark Magician off Yami's Duel Disk, grabbed the scissors, and cut the card up into little pieces. He turned to Yami with a maniacal grin, and a satisfied gleam in his eyes, and said, "I don't see any heart in this card, do you?"

Yami, distraught at the loss of his most treasured card, promptly fainted.  
Seto looked at him lying there. Should he, or should he not? "Oh, what the heck?" he said, and then proceeded to cut off all of Yami's hair. "Ha, take THAT starfish-head! Not only do you lose your favorite card, plus your hair, but I now win the duel by default! IN YOUR FACE!"

Kaiba then threw off his trench coat, opened the door of his mansion, where the duel had taken place, and ran around the city of Domino screaming, "I WON! I WON! I'M THE KING OF GAMES! I WON! YES! FINALLY! I HAVE REGAINED MY PLACE AS THE WORLDS NUMBER ONE DUELLIST! FREEDOM TO THE BLUE EYES!"

Meanwhile, Joey was watching Kaiba from across the road with an amused look on his face.  
"Joey," Mokuba asked, having been looked after by Joey while Seto was duelling, "I think my Big Brother's gone mad."  
"I think you might be right, Mokuba," Joey replied, "You might just be right…"

* * *

Well, that's chapter one! Sorry it's so short! Please review, this is my first attempt at a humor fic, please be encouraging. Flamers become my mid slaves, whom I shall feed to my Shadow Beasts!

Love Sami, Ryou's Hikari.


	2. I wanna puppy!

Hi, guys! I got so many reviews for this story! Thanks to all of you! Here's the next chapter.

_Disclaimer:_ I do not own YuGiOh, but I own Pup-Luv Centre and a puppy!

* * *

It had been three weeks since Mokuba had last visited Seto at the Domino Mental Institution, and by the time he left, Seto was clutching his knees to his chest and chanting, "Mokie, Mokie, Mokie…" in a sing-song voice. Mokuba was now the CEO of Kaiba Corp, and he was determined to make it into a brilliant company once more! Better than anything Seto could have done.

He checked his answering machine. There were twenty nine messages.

1: **"Dear customer, we have a whole new range of Gravity-Defying trench coats. They come in all new colors, like black, light blue, red and gold, with all new Gravity-Defyingness! Half price sale on Tuesday, be there or be pulled down by Gravity!"**

2:** "Mokuba, I hope you know that your brother is only like this because he didn't believe in the Heart of the Cards, so I don't want you blaming me for sending him a picture of a card with a heart inside it. And besides…HE CUT OFF MY HAIR! All that hair gel wasted! Damn you Kaiba's, I was glad I sent that picture, I…Oh SHIT! It's still on!"**

Mokuba was beginning to get annoyed, and it was only the second message.

3:** "We regret to inform you that your brother stuck his head in a canary cage this morning and pretended to be a canary, so he has been moved to the Domino Institution for Psychotic Animals. Oh wait, sorry, wrong number, we meant to call that Ishizu woman…sorry!" **

4: **"This is an automatic calling system that will begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1-Dear sir or madam, would you like to win a puppy? It's a golden retriever that loves food, playing, sleeping, affection, collars and leashes. To win, please call 1902-PUP-LUV and put in your details…"**

Mokuba pressed delete on all the other messages, and rang the number he just heard! **"Hello, you've reached Pup-Luv Centre, Domino, please hold." **Mokuba held the phone up to his ear, listening to the jingle. "This is the love that will never end; it's for a puppy that will be your friend. Someone bought a pup and didn't know what breed it was, but now everybody loves it and they don't know it's because: This is the love that will never end; it's for a puppy that will be your friend. Someone bought a pup and didn't know what breed it was, but now everybody loves it and they don't know it's because: This is the love that will never end…" Mokuba's eye was twitching dangerously, and the person took the phone just in time. **"Okay, we're back, how can Pup-Luv Centre help you? Okay, you wanted the golden retriever? One moment, please. Yes, we can have him there by tonight. Would you like to hear him speak?" **Mokuba eagerly said yes, and waited for the yap of his new puppy!

"Eh, Serenity, why'd you wake me up?" Mokuba heard through the phone. 'They tricked me! They tricked me, Joey and Serenity played that prank on me…' he thought.

He slammed the phone down. "But… I wanted a puppy…" Mokuba's bottom lip began to tremble. All of a sudden he screamed! **"I WANNA PUPPY, I WANNA PUPPY, I WANNA PUPPY, I WANNA PUPPY!" **He jumped around and around screaming, and had the worst temper tantrum ever caused by a twelve year old Chief Executive Officer.

He then proceeded to jump out the window, and went bouncing down the street, chased by police in helicopters. Mokuba climbed to the top of the Game Shop, where he then pushed Yugi out the window, ran into the Game Shop basement, and curled up in the fetal position, whispering: "puppy…I want a puppy…Will you be my puppy, Joey, or you, Yugi? I need puppy. Puppy. Seto was a puppy. I'm a puppy…We're all puppies! Bark, bark. Woof!"

Meanwhile, the dog catchers were standing in a row outside the game shop, holding their nets menacingly.

"Let's lock and load girls," The leader, a particularly ugly woman with a moustache said, before they all stormed the Game Shop. Mokuba stood no chance. Poor, poor puppy!

* * *

Okay, how was it? I believe it's a classic example why puppies and phone messages don't mix! Anyway, please review, even if this chapter was crap.

Thanks:

My Seto –Hey, you wrote KaibaCampingDisaster! Awesome, I love that fic! I'll try to keep going, but I'm only going to update every week or so, I'm focusing more on my other fics. Thanks!

Lord Sage –Glad you liked it! Here's the next one! Thanks!

Sakina the Fallen Angel –I know, they should have an episode with that! I thought it would be so funny! Thanks for the review!

Yamimizu-chan –It's really that good? Wow, I had no idea this would be so popular! Thanks so much for the review, I loved it!

Cazeh –OMG! You DIED! Are you okay! Thanks for the review, but honestly, take it easy; I can't have any reviewers dying! Thanks!

Dark Magician Girl Hikaru –I do suck at humor! Trust me! I'm ecstatic you like it though! Here's more for you! Thanks for the review, really!

Antibaseball –glad you liked it, I'm really appreciative of your review! I loved it!

NoroLimAsfaloth –It was ridiculously stupid? Oh well, it made you laugh, and that's good! Thanks for the review!

MsHobgoblin –I'm so happy my fic made you smile! I loved the response to this fic, and your review was one of my faves! Thanks!

Redhairnightmare –YEAH! Go Kaiba! He's now in the mental home! Poor thing…Thanks so much for the review!

Computerfreak101 –Yep, my first attempt at humor! The idea just popped into my head, and ideas that just pop into your head cannot be ignored…unless it's about brutally murdering someone, then not so much…I'm glad I made you laugh so much! I'm so happy I'm one of your fave authors! Thanks! You are probably my best reviewer!

MysticDragon1691 –Yes, the hair is gone! No more Starfish head! Nah, I like Yami's hair, it rocks, and the DM's cool, but I just loved the idea of doing that! Yes, it was random, as was this chapter! Thanks!

Stormrose Dewleaf –Hey Stormrose! Chapter two is here! I'm really happy you liked chapter one! This isn't as funny, but oh well! Thanks for reviewing; you are one of my best reviewers!

Love Sami, Ryou's Hikari.


	3. Bring back my hair

Here is chapter three, nuff said, I don't own YuGiOh.

* * *

Yami was sitting on his bed, staring mournfully out the window, singing a little song. If you got close enough, which no one did, you could hear the words coming out of his mouth. It was a song of mourning, of loss, sadness, grief… Yami was very distraught…

"Bring back my yellow, red and black hued hair,

It is no longer anywhere, not here nor there.

Kaiba went completely and utterly mad,

And the hair that I once owned, the hair that I had,

Is now all chopped off, yes it's all gone.

So I sing this sorrowful, mourning song:

Bring back my yellow, red and black hued hair…"

He began humming the words instead of singing them. He finally stopped singing, and went downstairs. He got the keys, and took the car round to the hospital. He walked around for a while to find the room he was looking for, and entered.

"Hello Yugi," he said. "How have you been since Mokuba pushed you out the window? Is your neck feeling any better? And how's your broken collar bone? And arm? And leg? And elbow? And toe? And…" Yami rattled of Yugi's various broken bones. Yugi signaled him to stop. Yami stopped. Yugi sweat-dropped.

"Yami, I'm fine, I'm worried about you, you've been depressed ever since Kaiba cut off your hair!" Yami then proceeded to break down in tears, going, "my hair! He cut off my awesome, spiky, tri-colored, red, black and yellow, lightning bolt, porcupiney, starfish hair! I want my hair back! I want my precious hair…Hair…my precious…he cuts off my precious…we shall make him pay…the insane card cutter shall pay…" Yugi groaned. "Well Yami, how do you think _I_ feel about my Dark Magician that he cut up? That wasn't only yours, it was mine as well!" Yami thought about this.

"Wait…he DID cut up or Dark Magician! I'd forgotten!" Yami's eyes watered. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! I WANT MY DARK MAGICIAN! HE KILLED IT! NOW WE CAN'T EVER USE IT'S DARK MAGIC ATTACK TO DESTROY THE HEART OF THE CARDS NON-BELIEVERS! NOOOOOOOOOO!" Yami threw himself to the floor, beating the carpet with his hands and crying like a baby.

Yugi sweat-dropped again. 'My Yami is so pathetic,' he thought. 'Malik gets the murderous Yami with a cool, inhuman voice, and Ryou gets a tomb robber with bunny ears in his hair, and I get a complainer that can't lose or else he throws a huge temper tantrum. I was always kind and pure-hearted! What did I do to deserve him!'

Yami was now jerking violently and throwing himself against the wall, each time shouting out some random words like, "DARK MAGICIAN", "HAIR" or "KAIBA". He fell to the ground in a shaking heap. Three overweight men in white suits came and dragged him away. And that is a lesson for anyone who ever destroys Yami's hair or his Dark Magician: You will be making the King of Games go insane.

* * *

Okay, that chapter is complete. Thanks:

nmlssone –Oh, finally someone comments on the Marik gone crazy call! THANK YOU! I have been wondering if anyone would write about that! I was going to make it Joey originally, but I needed him to be the puppy. Ha, glad you liked the "I don't see any heart in this card, do you?" quote as well! I loved that! Thanks a billion for the reviews!

redhairnightmare –Aw, I am so sorry about your cats! I wish you the best in getting over them! My cousin lost a pet a few years ago, it was horrible! I sympathize, I really do! Thanks for the review!

Sakina the Fallen Angel –Hey Sakina! I'm sorry last chapter wasn't that good; I was sick all of last week, so that is my excuse! Thanks for the review!

Dark Magician Girl Hikaru –Thanks so much for your review, and that '/' thing is VERY annoying, I used to get that too! Thanks for the review!

Computerfreak101 –Here is Yami going mental just for you! And you ARE my best reviewer, I always love getting your reviews, ever since you reviewed chapter one of Domino City Karaoke Contest! Thanks for the review!

BlackJackal –I am very glad I caused you to laugh so long! Thanks for the review!

Stormrose Dewleaf –Hey Stormrose! You actually thought it was funnier? Wow, you are the first! I loved your review, but Seto is my Yami's guy! Mokuba is so cute! Thanks for reviewing!

My Seto –I will definitely keep it up, thanks for reviewing!

InsaneShadowFan –I am so happy you liked it! Yeah, I loved the Gravity Defying Trench Coat call too! Magic Kool-aid? WTF, mate? Thanks for reviewing.

SpiritAnime –I lied? I am funny? I honestly did not know that, I was really wary about doing a humor fic, because my talents are in angst and romance, but I will gladly accept your praise! Thanks for you review!

Biglos07 –Yep, pretty wild stuff happens when the YuGiOh crew goes mad! I may check out some of your work when I have time, we shall see, it also depends what kind of stories you write and what pairings you put. Thanks for your review.

LeoLuv4Starz –You gave me a lot of praise for this, thank you so much for reviewing!

Setosgirl –I know, it isn't that long, but I'm glad you liked it! Thanks!

Sparklythings –I am very glad you liked my story that much and I love the name you use for yourself!

Fan of Fan Fic –The BEST YuGiOh fic you've read so far! OMG, are you serious! That is amazing, thank you so much! And you put me on your faves, you ROCK! We like the same bands, that is cool! Thanks for reviewing!

MysticDragon1691 –I know, we all regret the loss of Yami's hair! Sadly, not many people seem to care for his Dark Magician. Poor Dark Magician! Thanks for reviewing!

Thanks for reviewing everyone!


	4. Midget Porcupines

Hi all of my brilliant reviewers!Here we have it, the next installment of When YuGiOh Characters Go Mad! I hope you all like it, enjoy!

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own YuGiOh.

* * *

Yugi Moto stood by his window, having gotten out of hospital three days ago. He missed his Yami; the house was empty without him; as Grandpa wasn't home because he was on an archaeological dig in Egypt. He discovered that staring out the window gets boring after ten minutes, so he decided to go downstairs.

He trod down the stairs gently, because his leg had been broken when he'd been pushed out of the window by Mokuba. Yugi went into the kitchen to get himself aglass of chocolate milk. After he'd drained the glass, he heard a weird, shuffling noise from the back garden. Yugi went to investigate.

"Aw," he cooed, staring at the bush next to the back door. "How adorable!" For there in the bush was a little porcupine, with really sharp spines that went everywhere, and big innocent eyes (like Yugi). Yugi picked it up from underneath, and took the porcupine inside. 'He can be my new companion!' thought Yugi excitedly. 'We can do everything together and I can look after him and teach him how to duel and we can be best friends and I'm gonna call him Yami, after my old Yami,' he thought, hugging the porcupine, with gloves on, of course!

And indeed, Yugi and Yami (the porcupine) did everything together, they saw movies together, they played in the game shop together, and Yugi even went so far as to dye Yami's spines red, black and yellow! But Yami (the porcupine) still had never met any of Yugi's friends. It was then, after a grand two weeks with said porcupine, that Yugi decided to introduce Yami (the porcupine) to his friends.

He invited Joey over to meet what he said was 'his new friend' and Joey arrived later that day, and discovered a porcupine sitting in Yugi's chair, with red, yellow and black spines, looking up at him with big innocent eyes. (Yugi was upstairs at the time) "Eh, Yugi, is that you?" he asked. The porcupine blinked. "Yugi what's happened to you, you've been transformed into some kind of…midget porcupine!" he shouted. The aforementioned porcupine glared angrily at Joey.

"Don't worry Yugi, I'll save ya!" and with that, Joey proceeded to race over to Yami (the porcupine) and tried to pull out its spines! The porcupine was extremely angry at this, and bit Joey on the crotch. (And that's gotta hurt! Folks, Joey Wheeler is DOWN!) Joey fell to the floor, groaning in agony. Yami (the porcupine) began to ram Joey with its spines; four times in the legs, three times in the stomach, twice in the arms, and once in the head. Joey fainted.

Yami (the porcupine) went back to its seat, a satisfied look on its little face. Yugi came in and saw the porcupine sitting on the couch with blood on its spines, and Joey lying, unmoving, on the floor. "Yami! You killed Joey!" he yelled. The porcupine blinked innocently up at him. Yugi cuddled up to the porcupine and started whispering, "It'll be okay, we won't go to jail Yami, I'll protect you." Yugi ran out the door, down the street and down the road, never to be seen again by any living person.

Joey and the others never looked for Yugi; they were convinced that Yugi had gone mad, and transformed himself into a porcupine, that attacked Joey, and they hated him for doing it. It was assumed by everybody who knew him well that Yugi had eventually gotten run over by a car, eaten by a wolf, or else just plain lost.

Yugi meanwhile, was sitting in a cave, patting a rock, going: "Yami, you are my new best friend. Hee Hee!" Yugi grew up to be a hermit living in that same cave today.

And somewhere a little porcupine was looking out over the city of Domino, blinking.

* * *

The end. I hope it was funny! Thanks:

Sakina the Fallen Angel –Sorry, Marik has already gone insane; he was the one that stuck his head in a canary cage in chapter two. But, if you want, I will put on a chapter about that. How about it? Thanks for reviewing!

Biglos07 –I'm really glad you liked that chapter! Thanks for reviewing!

InsaneShadowFan –Yep, poor little Yugi, with a crybaby for a Yami. (Oh, now Tea, girl don't you cry for me, cause my Yami is a crybaby and my name is Yugi! Sorry, I was inspired to change the lyrics of 'Oh Susannah!) I have mad skills? Wow, thanks for reviewing!

Dottie –Wow, the best ever, that is certainly a brilliant compliment! Thanks so much, I hope you like this chapter! Thanks for reviewing!

generic reviewer –I believe in the Heart of the Cards, don't worry, but I just like teasing Yami and Yugi about it! Don't kill Kaiba; he's my second favorite character! (Jumps in front of bazooka) Oh gee, thanks, now I'm dead!

Stormrose Dewleaf –Yugi is your boyfriend? I never knew. Let me know when the midget porcupines are born! LOL, just kidding! Yeah, I have two DM's as well, but remember, in YuGiOh world, they aren't as common. And yes, you were hyper. Thanks for reviewing!

EEJBan –If you die laughing' you'll be happy? I'll be happy if I die knowing YuGiOh is real, but to each his or her own, I guess. I'm very glad you burst out into uncontrollable laughter; I did the same thing after thinking about this chapter! Hope you like it! Thanks for reviewing!

redhairnightmare –Yes, poor Yami, poor Yami indeed! (Breaks into laughter!) Thanks for that review!

Pokemongirl2523 –Hey, cool pen name! Well, Yugi has gone mad, I hope you are happy! You get your friends to call you Yugi? Wow, you must really like him. I mean, I want to call my kids after the YuGiOh guys, and I want to change my last name to Hikari, but you are taking things way to far…LOL, just joking! Not about my last name and kids names though. I'm really pleased you love my story! Thanks for reviewing!

Ginji5 –Oh, your review made me laugh so much, I loved it! Thanks a bunch for even sending it!

yugirules –Yeah, (laughs) Yami did pull of MAD with capital letters! Your review was awesome, I laughed so much! Here is the next chapter, thanks for reviewing!

SpiritAnime –I cheered you up after a FOUR hour testing with no break. Wow, that is definitely saying a lot! Thanks so much for reviewing!

Slifer02 –Yep, driving characters insane is very fun! I get to call a porcupine Yami! Well, that wasn't fun, but a lot of this chapter was! Thanks for the review!

Mariku-san –Ooh, one of my fave writers on this site! Poor Yugi for getting the Yami that he did. A hint for the next chapter of You Stayed, hey? I'll keep an eye out for it, thanks!

Esellla –O-Kay…was that a good or bad review, I really couldn't tell.

Psycho BakuRyou –Wow, another review from a fave writer of mine, thanks! It's good to know I don't suck at humor! Your hair got cut off by a mad CEO with a serious issue with the Heart of the Cards? Right…Wow, I get an excellent stamp, thanks teacher! You are making another chapter! WOOT! Thanks for reviewing!

This has gotten forty six reviews…for three chapters! I would like to thank all of you for that, it is the most I have gotten for three chapters ever in my entire month at writing for fanfic net! Thanks!

Love Sami, Ryou's Hikari.


	5. Domino Institute for Psychotic Animals

Hi everyone! Sorry about updating so late, I have been really busy! I decided to update because today is Friday in Australia, and it is my birthday! Well, this is a chapter explaining the phone call Mokuba got about someone being taken to the Domino Institute for Psychotic Animals! Enjoy!

_Disclaimer: _I got YuGiOh for my birthday! YAY! But sadly, I do not own a canary, or a museum. Next year maybe?

* * *

Marik Ishtar was waiting for his sister to come back from the pet store; she had told him she was getting a pet today, and Marik couldn't wait to see what it was. He heard the keys in the front door, and raced to greet his sister. "Hey Ishizu, what did you get at the pet store? Is it something cool, hey what's in that bird cage? Is it a vulture, or maybe a raven?" Ishizu took of the cage cover to reveal a terrible, gruesome and fearful…canary.

Marik felt his jaw drop to the ground. His sister had bought a measly canary? What about pit bulls that ripped other dogs throats out or cats that hissed and bared their claws at strangers! "Sister, why did you get a canary? What do we need it for? Are we going to wring its neck and roast it over the barbecue for dinner tonight? Because other than that I see no other use for a stupid, yellow puffball!"

Ishizu glared at Marik. "Do not speak about my pet that way, we will NOT be eating him and he is not a puffball! By the way, he has a name, it's Chirps! You will treat Chirps as one of the family, like you would treat Odion!" Marik glared at Chirps, who seemed to glare back. "Stupid puffball," he muttered. "Gah, what the fck!" Chirps the canary had escaped its cage and began to swoop over Marik's head, dive-bombing him from the lounge room chandelier. Marik managed to grab the canary by the throat and began to squeeze.

Chirps let out three high pitched shrieks and Ishizu ran swiftly into the room, having left to hang up the cage. "Marik, put Chirps down!" she roared, her face as red as a sunset in Egypt. Marik cursed under his breath, and made a note to strike Ishizu with bubonic plague as soon as he got around to finding a capsule of the disease in the high tech hospital research centre down the other end of town. He dropped the bird on the floor, and it landed at an angle, one winged splayed oddly on the floor.

"Marik, you idiotic fool, you could have broken its wing!" Ishizu looked like an erupting volcano as she swept the canary off the floor. Marik rolled his eyes, walking up to his room. He went down two hours later to find Ishizu out of the house, and Chirps at the bottom of the stairs, chirping evilly. Chirps froze, and then turned to look at Marik, who was paralyzed with fear. Wait a second, fear? The almighty Marik Ishtar, father killer and tomb keeper is afraid of a mere canary? (Marik: Shut up!) Shutting up now, don't mind me, I am just the authoress of this story...

Marik began to retreat slowly back up the stairs, being watched by the evil canary, before starting to run. "SCHREE!" The canary was flying towards him, gaining on him. Marik saw a sharp beak aimed right for his left eye and it was one inch away before…Marik ducked, turned around and slid down the stair railings. He ran towards the front door, to find it locked, Ishizu having taken the keys. WHAM! He felt a sharp pain in the back of his head, and turned around.

There he found Chirps the canary perched on his couch, with a beak dripping blood all over the Persian carpet, and impaled on its beak was Marik's human brain! Nah, just kidding. Actually, the bird held Marik's Egyptian God card, the Winged Dragon of Ra, in its beak. "Hey, give me back my God Card!" Marik screamed, furious at the bird that seemed intent on killing him. He lunged at the bird, a crazed glint in his eyes.

The bird took flight, launching itself around the room with one flap of it's weak wings. Marik chased after the bird for at least half an hour, before giving up and resting on the couch. All of a sudden, the canary swooped down to land in front of him, sitting on the coffee table; holding the God Card out to Marik. Marik took the card from the canary, and was starting to think maybe the bird wasn't so bad after all, when he felt something sticky on the palm of his hand.

"YOU LITTLE BUGGER!" Marik was furious! "YOU COME BACK HERE, NOBODY SHITS ON MARIK ISHTAR'S GOD CARD AND GETS AWAY WITH IT!" Marik screamed bloody murder, and the bird seemed to smirk before flying around the room. Marik ran after the bird, and then the bird was on a pillow, having landed. "Oh, I have you now you little bugger, come to Marik!" He crept forward, edging closer to the bird. When he was about five metres away he began to run at the bird, who took of at an immense pace. Marik found that he couldn't stop.

'Oh well, I will just collide with this pillow, no harm done,' he thought. But when he hit the pillow, the cover came off; revealing that what he had actually ran into was the canary's STEEL cage. Marik discovered his head trapped inside the cage, but found nothing else. He couldn't remember who he was or where he was. "Who am I?" Marik wondered aloud. "What is my name?"

He looked at the tag hanging in front of his eyes. "Ch-Chirps the ca-ca-canary!" Marik read, finding it difficult to read after having such a nasty bump on the head. "Okay, so my name is Chirps, and I'm a canary," he said uneasily. 'Well,' he thought, 'If I am a canary I should act like one.' Marik got down to the ground and began flapping his arms, going, "Tweet, tweet!" He jumped around with each flap of his wings. He didn't look where he was going and jumped into the museum gardens, which were just next to his window, as he lived with his sister on site at the museum.

People began looking at him and pointing, and sooner or later, the men in the white suits came to take Marik away to the Domino Institute for Psychotic Animals. Later that night, Ishizu got a call going,

"Hello, Miss Ishtar, we just wanted to tell you that your brother stuck his head in a canary cage and has acted like a canary for the past seven hours, sorry for the lateness of alerting you, but we accidentally called that Kaiba kid instead. You can visit you brother at the Domino Institute for Psychotic Animals tomorrow, when he is safe to visit. Goodbye."

Ishizu looked at Chirps, who was nestled into a pillow, smirking as much as a bird can smirk. When Marik got out of the institute they were going to have a lot of fun…

* * *

Well that was the chapter! I would like to thank:

Redhairnightmare –A mortal fear of porcupines? (Sweatdrops) LOOK, BEHIND YOU, A PORCUPINE! LOL, and yes Joey will be scarred, and I do not think he can ever have children. Thanks for reviewing!

SpiritAnime –I am very happy you love my story! Um, I'll do Tea either next chapter or the one after that, maybe. I am so glad this story helped you laugh after all those tests! LOL! Thanks for reviewing!

silver-dagger-113 –I am pleased you liked it so much! I hope this chapter eased your curiosity! Thanks for reviewing!

yugirules –Even better than the last? Yeah, I thought so! Yami the porcupine was a very interesting little character, wasn't he? Poor Joey, his crotch the victim of a midget porcupine. I have a knack for this? Woah, I didn't think I had a knack for any genre except angst, thanks! Much love and thanks for reviewing!

Luwa –Yep, Joey was bitten on the crotch, poor puppy! Oh well, he'll be alright, although his dignity won't! Thanks for reviewing!

Dark Magician Girl Hikaru –Hm, very crazy you say? Good to know, it was intended to be crazy! Poor Yami, he was forgotten so easily; I wonder if the new Yami kept Yugi company well? Thanks so much for reviewing!

Stormrose Dewleaf –Yep, the midget porcupines are coming. There is one ring to rule them all, one ring to bind them…unfortunately the ring that controls said porcupines is owned by Bakura, and he is away on vacation in the shadow realm! Tell Tamara to butt out! Joey deserved a bite on the crotch simply because he mistook Yami the porcupine for Yugi. Thanks for reviewing!

Biglos07 –I continue to crack you up, and that was all you needed to say! LOL thanks so much for reviewing!

Nmlssone –Um, LOL to you too! Thanks for reviewing!

Computerfreak101 –Hey! Yeah, of course you are my best reviewer! And don't forget, it is thanks to you that Domino City Karaoke Contest is still here; you were the only one who reviewed the first chapter, and had I not gotten the review, it would have been deleted. The fic, not the review. Yugi is very funny! Ryou will not be for another few chapters, I want to keep him sane for a while. Thanks for reviewing!

Hazel-Beka –Weird but funny is good enough for me! I am happy you like the fic, and yes, Joey would believe Yugi was a porcupine! Thanks for your praise and review!

Sakina the Fallen Angel –Yep, poor misguided Joey! Ooh, Hating Alison Ashley add! I'm back, sorry about that! I would rather like to bash Tea soon! Thanks for reviewing!

Slifer02 –Porcupines are cute! Well, to each his or her own, I guess. Aw, you have a dog? So do I! Thanks for reviewing!

Seto's sister –Wow, you reviewed a lot! I liked that Mokuba bit too! Did you actually collapse! Call a doctor! Thanks so much for your reviews, I loved them!

Dannys-Ghostly-Girl –Yugi and the porcupine that attacked Joey! Ha, what a riot! Yugi did go pretty insane, I have to admit even I was scared! Ha, Yugi is very vertically challenged! You liked it when Yami went insane didn't you? Your reviews were awesome, thanks!

Mariku-san –I am extremely happy that you liked it and do not worry, Tea shall go mad soon! I want to bash that girl, so expect blood! Thanks for reviewing!

Hikari Skysong –I am glad you liked it, I hope I updated soon enough!

Thanks to everyone for reviewing, tune in next time!

Love Sami, Ryou's Hikari.


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